Grandpa Dick’s Strawberry-Pineapple Pie

My great granddad Richard (Grandpa Dick) is one of my all time favorite people. I loved that man more than words can say. He was bald, died with only one lung and a cigarette in his hand, was missing fingers for god only knows what reason (he told me a different story every time about how it happened), and used to tell me stories of how the Chinook Indians ambushed him and his buddies in the middle of the night and scalped them all and that’s why he was bald. He had a picture of me, 5 years old, stitches in my forehead from a jumping-on-the-furniture type accident, on his kitchen wall next to the cabinet where he kept the rat poison. He made the best white bread in the UNIVERSE, and the best fruit pies of any person alive. The myth and the legend that was Grandpa Dick shared his secrets only with me (from what I kn0w). Tonight I made his Strawberry Pineapple Pie and it really turned out great. I miss fishing with him, I miss laughing when he took out his false teeth, I miss sitting on his rusty step stool watching him bake sailor style… but death is a part of life and in my family, we pass on to our youth the things in our life that will make the biggest difference. My Grandpa Dick gave me the love of baking delicious things that make the house smell wonderful and brings the family together to eat and enjoy eachother’s company. This is one of those recipes.

For Grandpa Dick’s Strawberry Pineapple Pie, get this stuff ready:

(crust)
1 cup of Margarine
1/2 cup of Iced Water
3 cups of Flour
1/2 tsp of Salt
1 tablespoon of Sugar

(filling)
1 can of Pineapple Nibblets
2 small cartons or 1 big carton (like mine) or fresh, rinsed Strawberries
2 heaping tablespoons of Cornstarch
1/2 cup of Sugar
One big squeeze of Lemon Juice

For the filling, dump your Nibblets and only half of the juice from the can into a big bowl. Clean and slice your Strawberries and dump those into the bowl, too.

Add your Cornstarch, Sugar, and Lemon. Mix them together until the juices get all cloudy.

Pop the bowlful into the microwave for 10 minutes, and remember to give them a stir every 2 minutes or so. After the 10 minutes in the microwave, the juices should start to thicken and get all gooey. If they aren’t, try another 5 minutes in the microwave. NOTE: I forgot to start out the recipe in a microwave-safe bowl, so I had to transfer the filling into a glass bowl for the microwave part. Please start out this recipe in a microwave-safe bowl!


Now for the crust. I like to use my food processor for this just because its less messy, but you can also use the old fashioned two forks and a bowl method. Throw your Margarine, Flour, Salt, and Sugar into the food processor.

Pulse the mixture until there are no more pieces of Margarine and the mixture is very moist. Dump in your water and turn the food processor on low until the mixture looks like a big ball.

Divide the dough into two equal portions. Flour your rolling surface and press one dough portion into a little cow patty.

Roll it out evenly until its about a half a centimeter thick.

Fill your pie pan or glass baking dish with it and make sure there is dough hanging over the sides for later.

Remember to flour your rolling pin and rolling surface again before starting in on the top crust! Roll it out. Pour in your pie filling, then top with the crust you just rolled out. Cut off the excess and roll the edges together like you would a cigarette (gross, but I couldn’t think of another non-illegal example). Crimp the edges with a fork and score the top of the pie so the innards can release some heat.

Bake at 375°F (180°C) for 30 minutes, or until the top and edges start to brown.

Dead people don’t read blogs, but I hope I did my great granddad justice. It would break my heart if I ever let such a great man down. I love you Grandpa Dick! Catch ya on the flip side! Love, Peace, and Scalpin’ Indians!
Visualize Whirled Peas!
Btchinfixins@gmail.com

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One Response to “Grandpa Dick’s Strawberry-Pineapple Pie”

  1. kelly Says:

    I made this for Thnaksgiving this year and threw in a handful of Blackberries before putting in the pie shell. It was awesome.
    Thanks to you and Grandpa Dick!

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